Torture Brendan Episode V: Unfriended

 

Released Date: April 17, 2015
Running Time: 83 Minutes
Movie Suggested By: Stephanie Cardozo

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So, this is what it’s come to.  The Blair Witch Project in  iOS fashion.  This segment was a pretty short one for me, mainly because nothing really happens in the movie.

A few quick death scenes, and 80 minutes of millennial garbage.

Six high school friends gather for a group Skype chat, because that’s what you do instead of actually interacting with people.  The ghost of someone that these kids drove to suicide, haunts them online, giving this film the “cybernatural” label.
The highlight for me, was that after witnessing two friends die on camera, and one of them sticking his hand in a blender, the ghost decides to make them play a game of “never have I ever”.  We all know this game, it’s a drinking game, damn it. The ghost only communicates through Facebook messenger, email, and Skype chat text.  It makes them put 5 fingers up, and asks the questions.  If you have done the thing it says, you put a finger down, the first person with no fingers up is the loser.  The loser of the game would die.  Seems like fun, right?

I nearly died of laughter when the ghost typed, “never have I ever said that Blair has an eating disorder.  So, the chick that spread that rumor puts a finger down.  The two girls then begin to yell and scream at each other, “oh, you’re such a bitch, fuck you, blah blah blah”.  It was at this point I laughed at how dumb kids are these days.  They had just witnessed two friends kill themselves, online, and were being stalked by a dead girl, but blow up over this.

It’s no wonder you never hear about demonic possession anymore.  Demons can not compete with the evil of kids today.  It use to be the actual story of movies like “The Exorcist” is what scared me.  Now, whether it’s horror, comedy, drama, or action, what scares me is not the story, but how people today really think.

Beers: 🍺🍺🍺

*Witness the torture below*